Porter is the newest furry baby at Casa del Meyer – we got him about this time last year when he was 8 wks old.

He is a grade A pain in the ass.

Right now his ass is causing my nose pain. He got into the cat’s food (again!) and has dog farts that rival any noxious stench I’ve ever come across.

(Update: the stupid bastard just got into it again when I went for a potty break – grrrrr…..)

He knows one speed – one that results in him slipping all over the linoleum downstairs and peeling the the rugs off the hardwood floors (despite anti-slip backing): I like to call it “Bat out of Hell” fast. It has often toppled over my children and even myself a time or two – even though the little guy is a mere 40lbs, read: not a big dog.

He is a bully to our sweet lab and first furry baby, Gracie. Gracie of course is a docile lover that is too passive to assert herself against him and such Porter terrorizes her, namely in the hopes that she’ll roughhouse with him, but he’s too rough. We try to break him of it, but so far these efforts have only affirmed for us that springer spaniels are in a word, retarded thick-headed.

I know he is still a pup (just over a year old), and despite all of his frustrating traits, he is a sweetie.

There’s a scene in Marley and Me (LOVED that movie btw….Charlie Brown and I both cried our eyes out multiple times – and for different characters) when Jennifer Aniston’s character miscarries and the “worst dog ever” loves on her in that sensing way that animals have when she is crying her heart out.

Porter does this too. Along with many other of the sweet things that Marley did for his family.

Like with my children, I need to make sure that he knows he is a valuable part of our family, not always in trouble, before he’s lying on the vet’s table drawing his last breath.

If only I didn’t feel like breathing his farts could be my last breath.

© 2008 Ramblings of a Red-Headed Step-Child. All Rights Reserved

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