That’s how I feel now that the Fort Collins Coloradoan has some of the information regarding my childhood.

I prostituted for the cause, offering up the sordid details of my past for only potential payment – willing volunteers. Now, I feel like some sort of emotional porn star -with my past spread eagle and bare for all to see, in order to garner support for something near and dear to me: helping other people. And, it’s somewhat uncomfortable…methinks public transparency in America is REALLY stinkin’ hard to do, even for open-book types like myself.

I told my now-friend reporter last week in a phone call, “Hey, if you think it may work, we could look at this angle….” and when I didn’t hear from him immediately, I assumed he simply didn’t want to guilt trip the community about the count.

Course, I made an ass out of u-m-e doing such.

Yesterday he called me wanting a photo op and everything.

I’ll talk, but no pic.

I had NO makeup on and had let my hair air-dry yesterday – ummmmmmmm NO!

Very Firmly: We have to have a picture.

Well then, if we must how’s about this? I’ve got a training on Wednesday night, and the lucky camera person can snap me while I’m in my groove thang – provided I don’t break the camera lense.

(all you women reading this thinking I’ve got serious self-esteem issues, LIGHTEN UP!! It’s a joke – kay?)

So…today I’m all dressed up….got my sassy hair (newly highlighted – Charlie Brown couldn’t understand why I wanted to get a kit at the verylastminute last night – so I had to explain to him that false additions to my hair make me feel MUCH more secure about myself) got my spiel down pat.

Now…. hopefully more than the 5 RSVP’s I’ve gotten will show – seating for 50 is going to look really shoddy when it’s only 1/10th of the way full.